Last Second Shot

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

ELTON F*CKING BROWN???

http://www.ridiculousupside.com/2008/7/20/574442/breaking-the-ceiling-summe

"Elton Brown looks terrifying on the floor. In person? He's like a teddy bear. A big friendly teddy bear that you're kind of concerned will eat you." TRUE

"A physical bruiser known for his ability to bang down low and battle with bigs for offensive rebounds(and then turn them back over to the defense), Brown is a physical warrior on the court (hands made out of stone will give that impression). (NOT) Surprisingly, his attitude is a lot more laid back in person. Though people around him say he can be acerbic (what?) when provoked, he genuinely comes off as an easy going guy (maybe because he is, and he's lazy). The confidence is stunning for an undrafted player out of Virginia (GO WAHOOS!!!), who's spent time in the D-League (scrubs), Greece (SPARTA!!!!!), and Israel (JEWSSSS!!!!!!!!!), and is now competing again for an NBA roster spot (it better be an XXXL).

Brown was one of the last cuts with the Knicks in 2006 (ooooooooooh the knicks....), and one of the last cuts for the Lakers in 2007 (Phil felt sorry for him). He's never made it over the hump (he got winded about 1/4 the way through), though, and last year,despite averaging a double double (meats AND potatoes) in the D-League and being leaps (stifle laughter) and bounds (still cant beat gravity) above his colleagues in terms of physical play (slap-fighting) and rebounding (grasping for air), frustration led him to take the money and run... to Israel (WAFFLE HOUSE).

He's back, though, because the goal of playing in the NBA is still so close to within reach (ran out of money). And while that might drive some people completely nuts (or BONKERS!!), for Elton, it's just another regular day at the office.

Summer League days are hard (really?), but they're not unbearable (well then no one would do it then....). He wakes up around 9 or 10 (NO WAY!), grabs something (somethingSSSSSSSSSS) to eat, and heads to the arena for practice (we talking about practice? /iverson). The practices, he says are harder than the players thought they would be, but he's happy with that (makes him hungrier). He's a physical player (LIES!). He likes physical practices. He heads back to the hotel to rest before the game.(BIG SURPRISE!)

yeah im not bitter

Saturday, July 5, 2008

A-Rod, Gil Arenas

First story: another one bites the dust. First of all I wonder why the hell don't sports stars sign pre-nuptial agreements??? This happens time and time again. I read a NY Times article a few months ago that featured this one woman who after college at the age of 22/23 got married and then proceeded to married and divorced a total of SEVEN times over the course of the next ten years and never had to and will never have to work a job in her life. Hey I gotta give it to her. She was smart. Those seven guys were not. Come on guys lets be real here. I don't care how caring and nice your girl is. Of course no one wants to think about or contemplate divorce when you're walking that isle but think about it. A failure rate of 54% is the last I checked in the U.S. That is greater than HALF. Seriously. Would you ever embark on an endeavor that has a known failure rate to be greater than 50% without giving it some consideration and buying protection? This is even more important when you have so much to lose say HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF DOLLARS. Oh well I guess to each his own...

In other news: Gilbert Arenas decides to stay with the Wizards for less money. They were talking about this on Around the Horn yesterday on ESPN. Quite true. What's the difference between $111 million and $127 million? My answer: $16 million. I think it was a good move on Arenas' part. He is coming off knee surgeries and in fact one of the guys on ATH even mentioned that he is probably only worth $90 million. Touche. It remains to be seen. Wizards picked up a big man in the draft so hopefully this will help out Haywood. I think the team also needs a pure shooter.

Friday, May 30, 2008

gary? really?

"For Team 2, the best player on the floor (and likely of the day) was clearly Gary Forbes, stringing together one of the best single-game performances (30 points, 7-16 FG, 15-16 FT, 26 minutes) we've seen in the last five years of the pre-draft camp. Forbes was incredibly aggressive putting the ball on the floor with either hand and making very strong moves to the basket, being very physical once there and in turn getting to the free throw line at will. His scoring instincts might be the best of any wing player at this camp, as he makes up for his lack of freakish athleticism with phenomenal footwork and body control, being able to quickly read and exploit angles, or move intelligently without the ball, in turn showing a very good basketball IQ that impressed many people here. Although his perimeter shot wasn't a huge part of his game once again, he knocked down one of his two attempts from NBA range, which leaves optimism in that regard. He's making a strong push for consideration in the early second round or possibly higher."

SUBSTANDARD UVA COACHING STRIKES AGAIN

Monday, May 19, 2008

lolskies

http://sportsguy.blogspot.com/

backstory

fuck ESPN

Thursday, May 8, 2008

I'm a dumbass

Monday, May 5, 2008

Game 6: Cavaliers vs. Wizards

Well this is going to be the last Wizards post-game entry for this season. Wizards got crushed in game 6 and have now been eliminated by the Cavaliers from the playoffs for the third straight season. Not sure why Stevenson called LeBron overrated. The game was over midway through the second quarter. The only highlight was when the Papa Johns contestant actually made a three point shot to give the entire arena a free pizza the next day. First time it happened all season. Lots of question marks for the Wizards next season. Should be an interesting off-season.

LeBron

LeBron again

Sea of white didn't help

Oh yeah some guy had a "Princess James" pink t-shirt on.

Monday, April 28, 2008

NBA Playoffs 2008 Round 1: Wizards vs. Cavaliers

Game 3 in Washington, DC @ Verizon Center Wizards vs. Cavaliers. Cavaliers lead the series 2-0. The entire arena is wearing white t-shirts and waving white towels. DeShawn Stevenson is talking trash to LeBron. Gilbert Arenas starts but is ineffective and leaves injured. Mason and Blatche step it up. The crowd chants "overrated" to LeBron. The Wizards win big.

Hey it's Bruce Pearl.

Coaches Mike Brown and Eddie Jordan

LBJ "overrated" haha

LeBron entering after halftime

SOULJA BOY. (thanks southwest)

LeBron trying to figure out what to do...

JumboBron

FINAL SCORE

Thursday, April 17, 2008

LOLOLOLLOLOLOL

LOL

SO WHO DIDNT SEE THAT ONE COMING????

LIST OF OTHER PLAYERS THAT MIGHT BE OLDER THAN WE THINK:

ORLANDO HERNANDEZ
JOSE CONTRERAS
ALFONSO SORIANO
(APPARENTLY THEY DO NOT HAVE A VERY GOOD FILING SYSTEM IN THE CARIBBEAN SEA)

CHIEN MING WANG
HIDEO NOMO
CHAN HO PARK
ALL OTHER ASIAN BALLPLAYERS.
(ASIAN PEOPLE THINK THAT WHEN YOU ARE BORN YOU ARE ALREADY 1)

RICH HARDEN
KERRY WOOD
MARK PRIOR
PEDRO MARTINEZ
(IF YOUR ARM KEEPS FALLING OFF, YOU CANT BE THAT YOUNG RIGHT???!?!?)

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Philadelphia 76ers @ Washington Wizards

This game was close the entire time when the Wizards pulled away about 1/4 through the 4th quarter. Gilbert Arenas provided a very good spark off the bench. One thing that I did notice in the past two games is that Nick Young has not played at all. Caron Butler was out this game and the Wizards probably could have won more comfortably had he been in the lineup. I'm not really sure how the Sixers have the record they have right now because they don't really have anyone good on that team.

Brendan Haywood actually winning a tip

Coach Mo Cheeks. Remember when he used to coach the Portland Trailblazers and this girl was singing the National Anthem and forgot the words and he helped her out?

Crazy weird guy...

Andre Miller. Remember when he used to sport the 'fro when he was playing in college at Utah?

The other not as good A.I.

Game over

Playoffs here we come!

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Boston Celtics @ Washington Wizards

Wizards beat the Celtics 109-95 to become the only team in the NBA to beat the Celtics 3 times this season. Jamison dunked over KG (see previous post), and Gil played some good minutes coming off the bench. There was this really annoying (and probably very drunk) Celtics fan sitting a few rows in front of me who had a really crappy sign and was talking trash the whole time even though his team lost. I've got some really good content here. Enjoy.